Writings

Thank you


Yesterday was my birthday. I turned 43 so no biggie, one of those lukewarm numbers that almost feels insignificant to celebrate. But, insignificant or not, I made it here and that is reason enough to raise my glass in a grateful toast to life and especially to the life I have.
I started my day teaching the last leg of our weekend course here in Stockholm, had the privilege to sit in front of a group of curious yogis who absorbed the practice and teachings with intelligence and heart. I rode the bus out to my parents house with my head on my amazing husbands shoulder and arrived to the warmth of their home where they had prepared for a wonderful dinner. My mother had cooked my favorite, potatoes in the oven, made the French way, with cream and all. The candles were on the table, the fancy glasses filled with bubbles and I got to hear the birthday tune in three different languages. We spent the evening lazily watching television, but I got to spend it in the company of (almost) all the people who love me unconditionally, something that hasn't happened in many years
I ended the night with my beautiful baby girl on one arm and my beardy baby boy on the other and had right before falling asleep one of those indescribable moments when all I could feel was awe. Man oh man, am I lucky!

My last thoughts of the day landed on my other mother, the women who gave birth to me approximately 43 years ago. I felt a wave of gratitude and whispered to her in my head:

'Thank you. Thank you for giving me up all those years ago so that I could have this moment, so that I could have this life. I don't know what circumstance made you do it, don't know how I came about and don't know where, or even if you are right now, but what you did has made this beautiful awe inspiring moment possible and I am so grateful. It wasn't always easy, there were moments when I cursed your gene pool, the one that you gave me this face, this body and this mind that made me feel so different, but it lead me here and for that I am eternally grateful. If you could see me now, I know any trace of guilt, regret or remorse you may have felt throughout these years would be instantly erased because I count myself as one of the most blessed people on this earth. In case you are wondering, I am happy. Really really happy, so Thank you. Thank you so much.'

With Love

 

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